It’s been another tough week for everyone associated with 51allout. Not only did we have to sit through more Test cricket in the West Indies – the sort of turgid nonsense to which we owe our very existence – but we had to do so without any gin after Editor Steve decided that we ‘didn’t deserve it’ for slacking off in the past week or so. Faced with this, we desperately needed some hilarious YouTube videos to make us smile. And luckily, we managed to find the requisite four, using only a single search term.
First up is a flashback to one of the great Test matches, England’s two-wicket win over the West Indies all the way back in 2000, when the majority of the country was busy trying to suppress their laughter as they listened to track five on Standing On The Shoulder Of Giants. To take us through this epic Test is one Dominic Cork – Dead-Eye Dominic as we call him for some reason – the man who scored the winning runs. It’s a shame that he keeps checking his email throughout the video, but you can’t have everything.
Perhaps the most amazing thing about this clip is actually right at the end, where Alastair Cook delivers his single line with all the enthusiasm and gravitas that you might expect from England’s Test captain.
We’re not exactly sure what’s going on here. This seems to be another one of those freaky ads in which someone’s voice goes all funny. And there’s nothing official about it, according to Dead-Eye Dominic. Like we said, no idea, but he must have received an absolute wheelbarrow full of cash to make it all worthwhile.
Hold on a second! No sooner had we finished watching Dead-Eye Dominic’s first advert when we found another. In this one he demonstrates his skills in dissent before the narrator makes a fundamental error by assuming that England actually prepare for World Cups, rather than just rolling up at the last second and completely embarrassing themselves.
This is another of those videos that just doesn’t make any sense. Three minutes of county cricket filmed from about half a mile away, in which Dead-Eye Dominic picks up the wicket of somebody – we haven’t got a hope in hell of being able to tell you who it is – to wild applause from both members of the crowd. And then, just after the two minute mark, we finally see what the phrase ‘featuring Hen’ really means. We won’t spoil it for you. But when you do see it, you’ll shit bricks.